just like to say that the "big decision"from the lastpostwasNOT whether tosplit with him or not, but because most peoplethought that and decided to have a goodgossip about it,thats exactly whats had to happen :( inever wantedit to fucking happen and now im fucking gutted. if it was left just between me and him,we could've..no WOULD'VE saved it, but because somany peoplegotdragged in,and 2 many opinions were flying about, it wasn't possible. so yeah imnotin the bestof moods tbh.
jus wanna say sorrytomitch tbh but atleast we'llalways be bestfriends(L) :'(

ps my spacebar isabitbroke thats why mytypingis crap.

mmm.

talked to joe yesterday &idunno why but it really cheered me up :) jade& jordan had just left so now its just joee&ben alone with the geordies ahaa. there's still alot of hype about us all goingg to leicester(Y) imexcited! i hope it happens :)

im also really quite pissed off that some people believe that something happened between meand joewhenit DIDNT!!! and also how people are thinking that imgoing to ditch them to hang around with evie &that lot... even though they live in leicester.are you FUCKING STUPID?! im not that kinda person,although i do LOVE the guys so megga a lot, i would never ditch my old friends for them, cause ilove them too much, but i just wish that they could just accept that i've actually made some newfriends.. that appriciate me and care for me, andi know zach totally understands because he's the one thats helped methrough this.iloveyouzach <3

& i rlly dunno whether i should be writing this on here,but i guess im just hoping thathe'll read it.. cause tbh, since my holiday & since i started talking about joe&ben... andwell..allof the guys tbh , it seems as if my bf has gone all jealous.. and everytime we talk, its different. i feel as if i can't talk to him anymore, i dunno what to do, causei'dtalk to him about it but i dont wanna make it worse... i've got quite a big decision to make tbh. :(

28.07.09

mmmm, feeling abit down todaaay, feelingg as if one person who i'm supposed to be megaaaa close to, isn't actually as close as i thought :\ not mentioning names coz they might read this, but i guess it all started while i was on holiday causee there was one night where i got really upset & joe sat with me, with his arm round me, talking to me until i was okay, and i know thats really nt much to ask for... but it made me feel special tht someone who i don't even know too well could be that caring for me & then i realised how differently people treat me at home.. and i KNOW they care, they jus don't seem to showww it. & iknow i shouldn't even be thinking about joe&ben but i can't seem to stopp. i miss themm youuknowww & the rest of them :(

Rhodes.

well then. Rhodes was abs amazinggg!
did endless amounts of stuff, didn't do much in the 1st week tbh c'ept pool, beach & boat trips :) was really funn (:
i think it was monday joeeee came up to me and started talking to me and introduced me to the rest of the guys, i met so many people on this holiday that i couldn't possibly remember all of their names, but there was a few who are really special to me noww, joe ben evie amy jade & jordan, me and melissa spent most of the second week with these guys and everyday was very memorable (: wednesday night we all went out for a drink and shared a fishbowl between the 9 of us, it was gorgeous!
but tbh i really wanna thank joe and ben for cheering me up on thursday and friday, i'll never forget friday with joe, it was great :)
but i also wanna thank ALL of them for making my last night very memorable, went out for dinner with the girls, shared a blue lagoon fishbowl (we regretted that one LOL) then met up with everybody at the eclipse, we left before everyone else but then when u all came up back to the hotel i had to cry when i left you all cause somewhere in the back of my mind i thought that we all may not ever see eachother again, but we made a plan that when joe gets his car he's gonna drive us all down to leicester to see the rest of the guys ( joe&ben live in sheffield too B] )

i know i sound so utterly lame atm but i really do miss these guys & this is one of theeee best holidays i've ever had, 1 cause mel came with me :) and 2. cause i met some of the most amazing people, love you all loads tbh <3

holidaaaaaay

haven't been on here in timeeeeeeeeee. but yeah been in rhodes. still am. going home tomorrow though :(.
today was really fun, met up with joe and ben on the beach.. then came back to the pool and met up with the rest of them :) i really do love those guys aha. im gonna miss em a lot tbh, though hopefully will see joe and ben agen in sheffield :)
im so bummed im going home tomorrow cause ive had a right good time with those lot, partying tonight (y)
xxxx

11.07.09

finallyyy goingg on holiday today ^^
but its not really a holiday till tomorrow, cause we dont actually fly till 9pm, i've never had a nightflight before ^^ ah' im really excited (:

i've just finished packing (: i hope ive got everythinggg :L i've got a feeling ive forgot something thoo :L

mmmmm, i've got a belly ache now :( aha.
im goingg to miss selinaaa and mitch & zach <3<3
xx

10.07.09

went shopping with Melissa today; final holiday shopping :)
i got me some new VANS ^^ maaahaaa, i love vans ye'knows. i bought a few other bits & some presents for the mother, seeing as its her bday when we go away.
urmmmm we're going away tomorrow! :D i'm so exciteddddd tbh.



mmm feeling abit weird tbh, feeling as if people dont want to tal to me :/ like i'm on msn and there seems to be tension between me and a few of my friends.. isit my fault? hmmph.

good news!

OMG!!! MELISSA'S PASSPORT HAS FINALLY COME! SO WE NOW KNOW FOR DEFINATE THAT SHE'S COMING TO RHODES WITH US!!! (#) i'm sooo exciteddd, it's gonna be the most fun holiday i've EVER had! ahaha, took their time though, silly people ahaha. but yes! im so so so mega happy! 3 DAYS!!!

i've gott to go to Rotherham today :( lol i hate it there, but i've got to get me some more contact lenses cause i only has one extra pair left, and i need more for holidayy xp

ahh' i'm really relieved about the passporttt! and im also happy cause i found out when paramores new album is coming out XD XD! i love paramore <3

07.07.09

urrrmmmm found out some bad news from a friend this morning, really doingg my besst to try and help him but its quite hardd yanoee.
yes anyway i also found out that the passport has been printed! WHEY HEY! but the couriers haven't got it yet (N) ahah. but yeah hopefully.. should only be a couple of days! (Y)

just downloaded quite a lot of music actually that adam got me into (Y) brokencyde, cobra starship and blood on the dance floor (Y).

aahh' my mum has booked me in to do thee great Yorkshire run. 10KILOMETRES!!! ayy dear -.- lmaoo!

..

havn't wrote on this in ages.
well last week was quite a good week tbh. it was really fun. couldn't get rid of melissa :P aha.
monday; i went to hers to have a go on her NEW TRAMPOLINE omg i love it so much. lol.
tuesday; we went holiday shoppingggs and got some new stuffs.
thursday; went round again for the TRAMPOLINE lol
friday; we had to go to manchester for her passport interview aha. that was major funtimes, i thought we were going to get lost.
sunday; did my race for life (: then went to town with mitch & zach.

but im really pee'd off tbh, caus all of these passport people keep saying different things. 1 person said that we're deffinately gonna get her passport and she's deffo gonna beable to come to Rhodes with us. but when my mum phoned up today.. they said that they havnt even sent it for printing yet!!! what nobs! so yeah we're really struggling to get it in time tbh :\ hmmmm. i really hope it comes, cause im really excited... and i KNOW that she's excited. it'll be so fun.. fingers crossed tbh (yn)